Hey Mom!

Hey Mom! So in the wee hours of the morning this morning I found myself hopelessly and utterly lost in my own head.  As you may know, this past year has been rough and as a result of that I've chosen to walk away from athletics and transfer schools (for the third flipping time).  And honestly, even though my situation changed, how I felt didn't.  I still need time to process and heal and decide what exactly it is I'm going to do with my life.  The problem is these past two weeks I've been allowing myself to do something that is counteractive to both those things.  I let myself get really bitter and the thing about being bitter is it only makes you feel worse, which makes you more bitter, which only makes you feel worse, which makes you more bitter, which only makes you feel worse, which makes you more bitter,  which only makes you feel worse, which makes you more bitter. <--- Do you see the circle? Do you see it's viciousness. So this morning at 4:44am I was

Hey Mom! So this is the first blog of #YearFour and while I have not blogged consistently, I've consistently blogged for three whole years! For those of you who don't know I started this blog (thanks to the encouragement of my Mom) after I graduated high school. I'm not entirely sure what my reasons were at the time but you'd think someone had suggested I shave my head and tattoo my skull.  But guess what?  I fell in love with blogging.  It was a great outlet for me, blah blah became who I am today, blah blah gave me a voice, blah mushy stuff, blah, blah bloggy stuff. S o with all that in mind, there are a three things I would like say... 1. Thanks for reading this (Mom I'm looking at you) 2. Semi-colons are a straight jacket to my genius 3. I hate polo shirts for no good reason 4. I was making numbered lists before Buzzfeed made it cool. What does this have to do with anything?  Well clearly I have wisdom to impart so obviously it would be a disservice t

Loss can seem unfair in so many ways.  It feels unfair when it seems too soon.  It feels unfair that some pass old and grey while others seem to live within the span of mere moments.  To me, the most unfair aspect of loss is that nothing stops.  Tomorrow will still come, the phone will still ring.  People will continue working and tweeting and texting as if all is well in the world.  The world should stop, everyone should stop. Why don't they stop? Richard Cross had an impact on the people that he met.  Richard Cross was a husband, a father, a brother, a friend.  Richard Cross was significant, and saw the significance of the people he interacted with. So why? Why during this time of loss is there still work and traffic and classes? How can the internet machine continue to churn out meaningless posts while we are faced with the daunting task of mixing joy and sorrow?  While we celebrate the life of Richard Cross and we accept the fact that our world is a little paler.  Why don&#