Hey Mom!

Hey Mom! So one of my New Years resolutions is to learn how to cook and as such I have almost engulfed my kitchen in a fiery inferno on 16 separate occasions.  Now it's been about a month so obviously I'm a master chef and have a complete knowledge of all things food related. Of course it would be selfish to keep all this new found information to myself so I've decided to open a culinary school. While I'm waiting for the paper work to go through I've compiled a list of pro tips for all you hopeless people at home. Top Ten Pro-Tips for Aspiring Chefs 1. Anything is edible if you put enough ranch dressing on it. 2. If you aren't sure if something is cooked all the way ask a friend to try the first bite and wait 30-40 minutes. 3. You can become immune to food poisoning... at least I hope this is true because I've had it atleast 4 times since September (it was only my fault 3 of those times.... I am, after all, a professional). 4. Ya Mama is not as

Hey Mom! So they are replacing all the windows in my apartment building.  It's fine it's only winter and they are popping windows off the place like it's a giant Mr. Potato head.  This is not worst the part. For the rest of the month they can come at anytime between 8am and 4:30pm on any day they wish. This is not worst the part. The worst part dear friends is that this morning I spilled an entire litre of water on my bed.  I was trying to be all cool and casual and so I took a sip of my water bottle and then tossed it on my bed (all coolly and casually) and apparently the lid was not on the whole way... so the water flowed all cool and casual soaking my whole bed. Furthermore, I have taken the sheets off my bed and brought them to Calgary to wash them (because my parents don't charge me to do laundry).  So if at any point this weekend they show up... they will find a bare  mattress with a wet spot that looks awfully suspect. I'm not embarrassed about the Av