Not Very Charmin

Hey Mom!

So Corona virus has finally made me do something insane. No, I didn't stockpile supplies. No, I didn't buy a hundred thousand medical masks. No, I do not own a float tank's worth of hand sanitizer to sleep in. No, I did not book a flight to travel the world for $15. I have been calm, cool and collected whilst taking extra time to wash my hands and not touching my face.

BUT THEN I CALLED SOMEONE TO MAKE SURE THEY HAD TOILET PAPER. Now this person had sent me a message saying there was no toilet paper anywhere. And we both shook our heads and said "Wow people are cray-zee, eh?" and moved on with our lives. Well, I stopped in at the grocery store to get snacks after work today and I notice Hey they actually have toilet paper. We, of course, still have 12 rolls plus the two secret rolls I keep in case we run low because **shrug**

BUT 

(yes, Camronald, it is a big but), I thought oh they might not have gotten any toilet paper. AND THEN I CALLED THEM ON THE PHONE LIKE SOME SORT OF LUNATIC!

At the time, I did not think this was weird but when they sounded surprised and confused on the phone, I realized this was very weird. Like making your friend a sweater out of cat hair weird. Like ordering hotdog water at a restaurant weird. Like showing up at a party with a family photo album to share with whoever is unfortunate enough to talk to you weird.

So if you panicked and bought a gallon of hand soap. I get it. We can all learn from this experience. Like today, I learned that there is one less person in the world I will ever be able to make eye-contact with again. Yay learning.



A constant, two ply reminder of the faulty nature of human beings.



That is all.

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