Acid: Not even once
Hey Mom!
Firstly, let me apologize for the second drug reference in two weeks, but again I will assure you that I am not actually doing drugs, I just want all the other kids to think I'm stupid… I mean cool… drugs are cool (if you're stupid).
Story time! So I have my chemistry labs on Wednesdays which means that Wednesday mornings are like a midweek purgatory and once I survive it. I can conquer anything else the week may have in store for me (dear life that is NOT a challenge). Usually the agony is knowing that I am trapped in a sterile wasteland for 3 hours.
But today ladies and gentlemen, the agony took the form of pain… searing pain. While my face remains intact my pride does not. I burned the flip out of my hand with freaking acid. My first mistake was not wearing gloves, my second mistake was putting any faith in humanity and my third mistake was thinking that the worst had passed. After the initial burning had subsided skin had all dried out and I (stupidly) thought This isn't so bad!
But let's all look on the bright side!
Top Ten Good Things That Come From Burning Your Hand With Acid
Firstly, let me apologize for the second drug reference in two weeks, but again I will assure you that I am not actually doing drugs, I just want all the other kids to think I'm stupid… I mean cool… drugs are cool (if you're stupid).
Story time! So I have my chemistry labs on Wednesdays which means that Wednesday mornings are like a midweek purgatory and once I survive it. I can conquer anything else the week may have in store for me (dear life that is NOT a challenge). Usually the agony is knowing that I am trapped in a sterile wasteland for 3 hours.
But today ladies and gentlemen, the agony took the form of pain… searing pain. While my face remains intact my pride does not. I burned the flip out of my hand with freaking acid. My first mistake was not wearing gloves, my second mistake was putting any faith in humanity and my third mistake was thinking that the worst had passed. After the initial burning had subsided skin had all dried out and I (stupidly) thought This isn't so bad!
After the first 24 hours:
Now
- Nothing makes you look young like brand new skin
- You can get people to do all your writing for you.
- You get to buy all sorts of fun band-aids
- Ya Mama... will feel bad for you and make you cookies
- To prevent infection you probably shouldn't do the dishes
- You know when you are walking and randomly drop what you're holding for no apparent reason… well now you have a reason and it's apparent.
- I now have a reasonable excuse as to why I am incapable of snapping my fingers.
- I have two fingers without discernible fingerprints therefore I can commit the perfect crime
- No traction means I have eliminated any friction involved with tetris.... new high score here I come
- I now have two hypersensitive finger tips which is basically a superpower
That is all.
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