The Power of Dance, The Responsibility of Robax
Hey Mom!
So this is probably going to have a too-much-information vibe. It might not surprise you that I am not a trained dancer. I have all the grace and coordination of a dizzy octopus. I do, however, do a zumba style workout once a week in the privacy of my home in order to expand my arsenal of sick moves. More specifically, in bathroom with the door locked, in my underwear (told you it was too much information). The reason for this is that I know what I look like dancing and if someone saw me stumbling around, 14 steps behind the youtube lady and her class of spandex clad super humans, I would die. The reason why I do it in my underwear is because I'm already in the bathroom and then I don't have to wash workout clothes... your typical lose-win situation.
Now before I get into the rest of this story I would like to inform you of the following: I WAS STONE-COLD SOBER THE ENTIRE TIME.
It was late, we had some music on and I thought to myself You know what would be hilarious, if I do an interpretive dance to this Petra song. So I threw caution to the wind, I unleashed my zumba skills on the world... Around the 13 second mark you can hear a distinct popping which is my hip being slingshot out of its socket.
So I did what I always do when dance goes awry... I lay on the floor for a bit and then did an instructional video on my new favourite dance craze... the one person Paso Doble.
My family laughed and I went to bed feeling like a comic genius ( I am, after all, built for physical comedy). I woke up feeling like I had been in a terrible, terrible accident. The day goes by and my back gets worse and worse until I am in agony... finally I know what people who have seen me dance feel like... it is just burning, pain that no matter what you do there is no escape.
Now before I get into the rest of this story I would like to inform you of the following: I WAS NOT STONE-COLD SOBER THE ENTIRE TIME. If you don't know Robax works in the following way:
The Robax fairy eases all your pain but in exchange for all the working parts of your brain.
The rest of my evening was spent waiting for a delayed flight, trying to maintain consciousness, while making small talk with my Aunt's church group (which if any of you are reading this, your handwritten apology is in the mail).
That is all.
So this is probably going to have a too-much-information vibe. It might not surprise you that I am not a trained dancer. I have all the grace and coordination of a dizzy octopus. I do, however, do a zumba style workout once a week in the privacy of my home in order to expand my arsenal of sick moves. More specifically, in bathroom with the door locked, in my underwear (told you it was too much information). The reason for this is that I know what I look like dancing and if someone saw me stumbling around, 14 steps behind the youtube lady and her class of spandex clad super humans, I would die. The reason why I do it in my underwear is because I'm already in the bathroom and then I don't have to wash workout clothes... your typical lose-win situation.
Now before I get into the rest of this story I would like to inform you of the following: I WAS STONE-COLD SOBER THE ENTIRE TIME.
It was late, we had some music on and I thought to myself You know what would be hilarious, if I do an interpretive dance to this Petra song. So I threw caution to the wind, I unleashed my zumba skills on the world... Around the 13 second mark you can hear a distinct popping which is my hip being slingshot out of its socket.
So I did what I always do when dance goes awry... I lay on the floor for a bit and then did an instructional video on my new favourite dance craze... the one person Paso Doble.
My family laughed and I went to bed feeling like a comic genius ( I am, after all, built for physical comedy). I woke up feeling like I had been in a terrible, terrible accident. The day goes by and my back gets worse and worse until I am in agony... finally I know what people who have seen me dance feel like... it is just burning, pain that no matter what you do there is no escape.
Now before I get into the rest of this story I would like to inform you of the following: I WAS NOT STONE-COLD SOBER THE ENTIRE TIME. If you don't know Robax works in the following way:
The Robax fairy eases all your pain but in exchange for all the working parts of your brain.
The rest of my evening was spent waiting for a delayed flight, trying to maintain consciousness, while making small talk with my Aunt's church group (which if any of you are reading this, your handwritten apology is in the mail).
That is all.
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