The other kind of accident, Cindy-Lou Who and defensive driving.
Hey Mom!
So I know it's been awhile (I'm sure you're all relieved) but I'm back (sorry) and this is the 100th post on this blog which I thought was special until I realized I probably posted 100 times on my first one within the first year (I was really lonely and also not taking real courses). Also I think it's important to note that I also have 34 drafts... do you know what that means? It means 34 times I had the discretion to say this... this is actually too much. You're welcome.
Today I'd like to tell you a Christmas tale of peril and triumph... of despair and relief. My family decided to head to Calgary for a few days. So I loaded up my red Christmas-mobile and hit the road.
The roads were bad. I knew they were bad. I knew I would have to leave early and drive slowly. I knew that my hands would hurt after from gripping the steering wheel. And I knew that even my hilarious podcasts could not provide sufficient merriment to drive the unease that had my stomach is a choke-hold. BUT I also knew that I've done a lot of winter driving and that I've never had an accident (except that one time I drank a slurpee and a coffee and tried to get to Edmonton without stopping... but I think we all know I'm not talking about that kind of accident).
For the most part, things were uncomfortable but not scary. In fact, it wasn't until High River that I thought Ok I want to be done now. I stopped in High River to avoid the other kind of accident and also to tell my parents (who were driving ahead of me) about my hilarious podcasts. I went to turn left and my car didn't slow down, so like a defensive driver I went straight, turned around and took the right hand exit.
***dun dun dah Go team winter driving force for making safe deciiiiiiiiisions***
Then upon entering Calgary I hit an icy patch BUT before I hit said icy patch a trailer passed me. Suddenly the trailer is swinging like a pendulum across the road and then my car loses all semblance of traction... so fun right? At this point I think to myself I have all the Christmas presents in my car so if I crash the presents will be ruined and sure, we'll all be reminded that Christmas isn't about gifts, it's about spending time with each other but GUESS WHAT I WATCHED THE GRINCH YESTERDAY AND I ALREADY LEARNED THAT LESSON CINEMATICALLY THROUGH THE BEAUTIFUL HEART OF CINDY-LOU WHO!!!!
Finally, I am on the home stretch. I see two trucks over on the shoulder and decide to slow down a bit as a courtesy. Then I learned why the trucks were on the side of the road by going into a full spin on the highway. At this point I think to myself, I hope the christmas presents will cushion my fragile body. Then when I kept spinning I looked over at the truck I was careening towards and thought That truck looks expensive, I have no money. Please stop. PLEASE STOP! PLEASE ST...hey I actually stopped. I had in fact stopped, perpendicular to the truck about 2 feet away from it. I sat on the side of the road, half in the ditch for a bit trying to decide whether to cry or throw up but I ended up settling on waiting until I got to my aunt's house to see how I felt.
Turns out, I did neither. I hugged a puppy and had a nap and ate soup.
Tune in next time about my new-found love for minecraft (or don't I wouldn't blame you if you didn't).
That is all.
So I know it's been awhile (I'm sure you're all relieved) but I'm back (sorry) and this is the 100th post on this blog which I thought was special until I realized I probably posted 100 times on my first one within the first year (I was really lonely and also not taking real courses). Also I think it's important to note that I also have 34 drafts... do you know what that means? It means 34 times I had the discretion to say this... this is actually too much. You're welcome.
Today I'd like to tell you a Christmas tale of peril and triumph... of despair and relief. My family decided to head to Calgary for a few days. So I loaded up my red Christmas-mobile and hit the road.
The roads were bad. I knew they were bad. I knew I would have to leave early and drive slowly. I knew that my hands would hurt after from gripping the steering wheel. And I knew that even my hilarious podcasts could not provide sufficient merriment to drive the unease that had my stomach is a choke-hold. BUT I also knew that I've done a lot of winter driving and that I've never had an accident (except that one time I drank a slurpee and a coffee and tried to get to Edmonton without stopping... but I think we all know I'm not talking about that kind of accident).
For the most part, things were uncomfortable but not scary. In fact, it wasn't until High River that I thought Ok I want to be done now. I stopped in High River to avoid the other kind of accident and also to tell my parents (who were driving ahead of me) about my hilarious podcasts. I went to turn left and my car didn't slow down, so like a defensive driver I went straight, turned around and took the right hand exit.
***dun dun dah Go team winter driving force for making safe deciiiiiiiiisions***
Then upon entering Calgary I hit an icy patch BUT before I hit said icy patch a trailer passed me. Suddenly the trailer is swinging like a pendulum across the road and then my car loses all semblance of traction... so fun right? At this point I think to myself I have all the Christmas presents in my car so if I crash the presents will be ruined and sure, we'll all be reminded that Christmas isn't about gifts, it's about spending time with each other but GUESS WHAT I WATCHED THE GRINCH YESTERDAY AND I ALREADY LEARNED THAT LESSON CINEMATICALLY THROUGH THE BEAUTIFUL HEART OF CINDY-LOU WHO!!!!
Finally, I am on the home stretch. I see two trucks over on the shoulder and decide to slow down a bit as a courtesy. Then I learned why the trucks were on the side of the road by going into a full spin on the highway. At this point I think to myself, I hope the christmas presents will cushion my fragile body. Then when I kept spinning I looked over at the truck I was careening towards and thought That truck looks expensive, I have no money. Please stop. PLEASE STOP! PLEASE ST...hey I actually stopped. I had in fact stopped, perpendicular to the truck about 2 feet away from it. I sat on the side of the road, half in the ditch for a bit trying to decide whether to cry or throw up but I ended up settling on waiting until I got to my aunt's house to see how I felt.
Turns out, I did neither. I hugged a puppy and had a nap and ate soup.
Tune in next time about my new-found love for minecraft (or don't I wouldn't blame you if you didn't).
That is all.
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