(Kinda) Gross Gym Tour!

Hey Mom!

You know what people never get tired? People posting about their 'fitness journey' on the internet! But this is no ordinary fitness tale! This is an interactive (ish) photographic journey of my kinda gross gym! 


*** 3x exclamation point multiplier!!! (also I'm sorry but I just got back from the gym so I am full of whatever hormone drives people to use such ebullient vocabulary)***

I did not want to go to the gym tonight. In fact, I even typed 'Is is dangerous to go to the gym while cold and tired?' into google. And you know what the google told me? The internet said that unless I have a bleeding disorder to go to the gym. So I put on my most hilarious tank top and galaxy headband and stalled for an hour and then went to the (kinda) gross gym. 
Firstly, I stepped in this puddle, it's not relevant to this post but I wanted you to know.

A couple weeks ago my roommate pointed out to me that this spit has been there since we started going to the gym. Free protein?

For the first 20 minutes I flipped through flash cards. If I was going to suffer the injustice of cardio, I figured I might as well get my mental suffering out of the way too. 

Today was leg day (I am not some Chad Dudebro who goes around skipping leg day) and I was starting to feel the endorphins.
I am 100% posing (ie. this is not an action shot) while using the assisted machine. The last thing I need in my life is to have to explain to my boss that I hurt myself while taking pictures for my internet blog.

Then I worked out yatta yatta, etc., etc., and then in a moment of foolish ambition decided to finish up on the leg press machine.
As you can see, I am high. High off endorphins and also the gym is still empty so I've been able to be weird for the past hour.
And then I stretch.

This is the sad part of the gym that doesn't have any lights. It does however have a billion greasy hand marks on the mirror.

And then, at long last, I can use the foam roller.


An Ode to Foam Roller

Oh Destroyer of muscle knots!

Pain bringer and bearer

Liberator of lactic acid

Increaser of bloodflow

Promoter of healing

Thank you

Now,

I don't need

A massage from a stranger.



This isn't really relevant but I had to get new gym shoes because I, a grown, sober, adult, lost one of my shoes. My roommate found it in a snowbank a week later. But now I'm kind of worried that an animal is burrowed in it (statistically, I have large feet).

In case you haven't noticed the gym is all carpet. If you are thinking Nice! You are wrong. If you are thinking Sweat sponge! You are correct.

And now here we are: at home after a long hour at the kinda gross gym that I love because it's cheap and 24 hour and it's usually pretty empty so I never have to wait for a squat rack.



That is all.



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